Over the hills and through the woods to “The Cousins” house we go. Not just any ole cousin. You see, these two cousins are aristocrats. They are Irish Crème Golden Retrievers named Coco and Felix. I sort of blend right in with their color, in other words I match them very nicely. Size matters not to me at all. I mean I can run with the big dogs. The minute I arrived Coco went nuts! Mmmmm, let me see, I thought you were an aristocrat? Settle down. I’m sure she’s saying to herself, “Mom, we’ve got a new puppy in the house!” Coco says, “let’s run and play and jump on the furniture”. I say, “I really have to tinkle first, ok?” I mean I’ve been riding for five hours with only one potty break. That’s fine with me because I love to sleep while I’m riding. As you can expect the entire first day is pandemonium. I’ve run and played so hard I can hardly wait for dinner and go to bed. Speaking of dinner, I’m not quite sure why Mom brings my food because I always eat what the cousins are having. I eat like a hound dog while I’m there. I graze at home but here when the food goes down I eat it all right away. That’s because these dogs give a good first impression but sister when the food goes down it’s a free for all. They might look a little regal but don’t turn your head.
Day two and the Pet grooming van arrived out front. Good, a little peace for a while as the cousins are having their spa shampoo out in the van. Wait a cotton pickin’ minute. What? The grooming van peeps are coming for little ole me. What if they kidnap me? Mama, I never said I wanted a bath. I don’t care if it’s Christmas! Inside the van, there’s soft music playing and a luxurious tub awaiting little ole me. The ladies speak very softly and ask if I want a manicure, what shampoo would I like, and if I wanted a cream rinse to make my hair shine. Oh, and what treat would I like while my hair is drying. I tell you, I might just move to Dallas with “the cousins”!
Christmas arrives and the cousins’ stockings are full of treats, toys and a gadget called a Furbo. Their Mom and Dad plug this Furbo thing in and load it with treats. It has a camera that can spy on them during the day and actually talk to them from their parents phone. Mom and Dad can’t wait to show their two retrievers. The Furbo spits out a treat and hey those two cousins ran for the hills at the sound of that machine. Not this junkyard dog, I ran right after that treat and gobbled it up. I mean I came from the Wal-Mart in Jasper Texas. You don’t exactly sit back and wait your turn when the treats are flying right in front of you. I hear that treat machine sound again and this time there’s two treats. Yum, this is a walk in the park. Those two big dogs are scared of the treat machine. Buzz, they just keep popping out. I’m really loving the test of this new little gadget. I must’ve had ten treats before they stopped testing that thing. I drank so much water that evening I had to go out at midnight to potty. I’m thinking I may move in with the cousins. Let’s see the pet van spa at the front door, their backyard is covered with artificial turf and the coup de grace is this Furbo! Yep, that’s it, I’m moving to Dallas!